Random-Fun - Film Quotes - Apartment, The

Back to - Film Quotes - A

Apartment, The

Doctor Dreyfuss: Be a mensch!

Fran Kubelik: Shall I light the candles?
C.C. Baxter: It's a must! Gracious living-wise.

[Explaining the cracked mirror in her compact.]
Fran Kubelik: I like it that way. It makes me look the way I feel.

C.C. Baxter: The mirror...it's broken
Fran Kubelik: Yes, I know. I like it that way. Makes me look the way I feel.

J.D. Sheldrake: You see a girl a couple of t imes a week and sooner or later she thinks you'll divorce your wife. Not fair, is it?
C.C. Baxter: No, especially to your wife.

Fran Kubelik: When you're in love with a married man you shouldn't wear mascara.

C.C. Baxter: That's the way it crumbles... cookie-wise.

Fran Kubelik: I never catch colds.
C.C. Baxter: Really. I was reading some figures from the Sickness and Accident Claims Division. You know that the average New Yorker between the ages of twenty and fifty has two and a half colds a year.
Fran Kubelik: That makes me feel just terrible.
C.C. Baxter: Why?
Fran Kubelik: Well, to make the figures come out even, if I have no colds a year, some poor slob must have five colds a year.
C.C. Baxter: [sheepishly] Yeah... it's me.

C.C. Baxter: You hear what I said, Miss Kubelik? I absolutely adore you.
Fran Kubelik: Shut up and deal.

Baxter: On November 1st, 1959, the population of New York City was 8,042,753. If you laid all these people end to end, figuring an average height of five feet six and a half inches, they would reach from Times Square to the outskirts of Karachi, Pakistan. I know facts like this because I work for an insurance company - Consolidated Life of New York. We are one of the top five companies in the country. Last year we wrote nine point three billion dollars worth of policies. Our home office has 31,259 employees, which is more than the entire population of Natchez, Mississippi, or Gallup, New Mexico. I work on the 19th floor - Ordinary Policy department - Premium Accounting division - Section W - desk number 861.

Baxter: Miss Kubelik, one doesn't get to be a second administrative assistant around here unless he's a pretty good judge of character, and as far as I'm concerned you're tops. I mean, decency-wise and otherwise-wise.

C.C. Baxter: I used to live like Robinson and Crusoe, shipwrecked among 8 million people but one day I saw a footprint in the sand and there you were.

Fran Kubelik: Just because I wear a uniform doesn't make me a girl scout.
[in a bar, trying to pick Bud up]
Margie MacDougall: Night like this, it sorta spooks you, walking into an empty apartment.
C.C. Baxter: I said I had no family; I didn't say I had an empty apartment.

Kirkeby: Say, why don't we have ourselves a party, the four of us?
C.C. Baxter: No.
[Kirkeby sees Ms. Kubelik sleeping in the bedroom]
Kirkeby: [laughs] Well, I don't blame ya. So you hit the jackpot, eh kid? I mean Kubelikwise.
[Baxter pushes Kirkeby out of the door]
Kirkeby: Now don't worry, I won't say a word to anybody.
[Door almost shuts, Kirkeby pushes in one last time]
Kirkeby: Stay with it, Buddy-Boy.




	Home Jokes Film Quotes Boss Alert News Forum Links		Back to - Film Quotes - A Apartment, The Doctor Dreyfuss: Be a mensch! Fran Kubelik: Shall I light the candles? C.C. Baxter: It's a must! Gracious living-wise. [Explaining the cracked mirror in her compact.] Fran Kubelik: I like it that way. It makes me look the way I feel. C.C. Baxter: The mirror...it's broken Fran Kubelik: Yes, I know. I like it that way. Makes me look the way I feel. J.D. Sheldrake: You see a girl a couple of t imes a week and sooner or later she thinks you'll divorce your wife. Not fair, is it? C.C. Baxter: No, especially to your wife. Fran Kubelik: When you're in love with a married man you shouldn't wear mascara. C.C. Baxter: That's the way it crumbles... cookie-wise. Fran Kubelik: I never catch colds. C.C. Baxter: Really. I was reading some figures from the Sickness and Accident Claims Division. You know that the average New Yorker between the ages of twenty and fifty has two and a half colds a year. Fran Kubelik: That makes me feel just terrible. C.C. Baxter: Why? Fran Kubelik: Well, to make the figures come out even, if I have no colds a year, some poor slob must have five colds a year. C.C. Baxter: [sheepishly] Yeah... it's me. C.C. Baxter: You hear what I said, Miss Kubelik? I absolutely adore you. Fran Kubelik: Shut up and deal. Baxter: On November 1st, 1959, the population of New York City was 8,042,753. If you laid all these people end to end, figuring an average height of five feet six and a half inches, they would reach from Times Square to the outskirts of Karachi, Pakistan. I know facts like this because I work for an insurance company - Consolidated Life of New York. We are one of the top five companies in the country. Last year we wrote nine point three billion dollars worth of policies. Our home office has 31,259 employees, which is more than the entire population of Natchez, Mississippi, or Gallup, New Mexico. I work on the 19th floor - Ordinary Policy department - Premium Accounting division - Section W - desk number 861. Baxter: Miss Kubelik, one doesn't get to be a second administrative assistant around here unless he's a pretty good judge of character, and as far as I'm concerned you're tops. I mean, decency-wise and otherwise-wise. C.C. Baxter: I used to live like Robinson and Crusoe, shipwrecked among 8 million people but one day I saw a footprint in the sand and there you were. Fran Kubelik: Just because I wear a uniform doesn't make me a girl scout. [in a bar, trying to pick Bud up] Margie MacDougall: Night like this, it sorta spooks you, walking into an empty apartment. C.C. Baxter: I said I had no family; I didn't say I had an empty apartment. Kirkeby: Say, why don't we have ourselves a party, the four of us? C.C. Baxter: No. [Kirkeby sees Ms. Kubelik sleeping in the bedroom] Kirkeby: [laughs] Well, I don't blame ya. So you hit the jackpot, eh kid? I mean Kubelikwise. [Baxter pushes Kirkeby out of the door] Kirkeby: Now don't worry, I won't say a word to anybody. [Door almost shuts, Kirkeby pushes in one last time] Kirkeby: Stay with it, Buddy-Boy.