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Family Man, The

Jack: I'm in the middle of a deal!
Cash: Well, you're working on a new deal now, baby.

Annie: They did a pretty good job.
Jack: Who did?
Annie: The aliens, in the mothership. You look just like him.

Kate: How can you do that?
Jack: What?
Kate: Look at me like you haven't seen me every day for the last 13 years.

Jack: Well you know everything worked out, I mean I like Annie.
Kate: Well good Jack, maybe will keep her.

Jack: Because you thought I was *cocky*, I'm now on a permanent *acid trip*?

[walking the dog in the snow]
Jack: If you could take a dump sometime in this century, then we could go home where it's warm.

Annie: Do you like kids?
Jack: On a case-by-case basis.
Annie: Do you know how to make chocolate milk?
Jack: I think I could figure it out.
Annie: Promise you won't kidnap me an my brother and plant stuff in our brains?
Jack: Sure.
Annie: Welcome to earth.

Jack: I'm sorry that I used to be such a saint back then, and I'm such a *prick* now!